Life is full of opportunities to make decisions. Choices, choices, choices.
- Which movie should I go to?
- What should I make for dinner?
- What outfit should I wear today?
For the most part, those decisions are relatively easy to make. Much more difficult and confronting are the decisions which are life altering.
- Do I get married?
- Do I get divorced?
- Do I have a baby?
- Do I have another child?
- Do I quit my job?
- Do I relocate my family for my work?
Whether faced with minor choices or life changing decisions, this is a set up for your Inner Critic to have a field day. She can ruin your evening if you find yourself overdressed at a party. She can spoil lovely family time if they didn’t like what you prepared. But much more significantly, she can paralyze your ability to take action in circumstances that will change your life.
She can keep you stuck in mind boggling indecision, undermining any possibility of moving forward, one way or another. She can flood your mind with “what if’s.”
- What if it’s the wrong choice?
- What if I regret that choice?
- What if people get hurt by my choice?
- What if others don’t like me because of the choice I’m making?
Our Inner Critic tries to convince us that we must make the “perfect” choice, the choice that she is certain is the “right” one to make. Whenever you get clear on a decision, she can move into high gear, seducing you into second guessing your choice. With relentless questions about what is right and what is wrong, what is good and what is bad, she now has the power to create chronic indecision and inertia.
The Inner Critic is rooted in the domain of duality. She has you believe that all choices are good or bad or right or wrong. We can learn to disempower her ability to keep us stuck by disengaging from the domain of duality. When we give ourselves permission to examine what is true for ME, we can begin to develop an ability to trust our own thinking. Developing this ability allows us to know what is a good choice for me because it is MY truth.
When we make choices driven by our Inner Critic’s need to be perfect, we find ourselves making choices based on factors outside of ourselves. Freedom from the power of the Inner Critic to be in the driver’s seat of our lives means being willing to listen to our own voices.