Whenever someone is seeking either a counseling session with me or is enrolling in one of my workshops, what they’re really looking for is to change something in their life that is causing them to struggle. It could be that they want to change something about themselves or particular circumstances in their life. It could be that they want to fix a relationship, have a parenting issue, or want a career change. The list of what people want to fix or change about themselves or some aspect of life is endless.
But, here is the one basic truth about how to end any struggle. It really boils down to one simple step. Practice love and gratitude.
Rather than practicing love and gratitude, we habitually and automatically live in fear and try to control that condition. You see, most of us go through life believing that something in life needs to change in order for us to feel the way that we want to feel. Most people have a “some day” approach to life. When the circumstances are different, I will feel different. So, we try and control the circumstances in order to fix how we feel. And when we inevitably fail in controlling life, it makes us more anxious and uncomfortable, which makes us try to control it even more! It is a vicious circle.
There really is a way out of this ridiculous loop. You just have to try something very different than what we are habituated to. Practice love and gratitude. That’s it. The results often are nothing short of phenomenal. Give up the “someday” approach to life. Stop waiting until life changes to feel fulfilled, content, and joyful. Even if you’re dealing with something very disturbing, practice dealing with the situation with love and gratitude instead of the automatic fearful thoughts that cause anger, resentment and frustration.
Joy, fulfillment and satisfaction in life is a choice. We can either blame the outside world for why we feel unhappy, or we can stop the “someday’ approach by practicing love and gratitude.
I don’t know about you, but I’d rather say goodbye to someday.